Worst Week EVER!!!

    This has been the worst week of my life up to date.

    Last week when my mom was admitted into the ICU, things were crazy. We were left in the dark about sooooo many things. Once the doctors started explaining everything that was wrong with her I kinda wished they still hadn't said anything. We found out that she had severe pneumonia, a high fever, and that her lungs weren't working like they should. Everyday just brought on more bad news. More swelling. Higher fever. No surgery could be done until they figured out where the blood that she was throwing up was coming from. They couldn't do the scope to see where the blood was coming from until her fever went down.
    As the days were going on and the more tired we got, things just seemed more and more hopeless. Each day they were having to up her morphine and her sedation. They kept having to increasing her ventilator. We were just devastated. My mom didn't want any of this. She didn't deserve any of this. She may have been a lot of things and had her issues to work out, but this suffering was uncalled for. By Friday we had a few nurses and doctors tell us that my mom would not be leaving the hospital. That she was not going to be able to get better. We were breaking down. The only thing they had been able to do was the scope and found an ulcer in her esophagus. No active bleed. That was good. That was the only good thing that had happened.
    By the weekend we were done. What kind of monsters were we for letting her suffer? She wasn't going to get better. We couldn't do this to her anymore. I couldn't watch her be miserable any longer. My grandma and I had to finally talk about what to do. We agreed the only humane thing to do was to let her go. We decided to get a meeting with the doctor to decide when we should start moving forward with her last wishes. I was heartbroken.
    Yesterday we had that meeting. The general doctors meet with us and told us there was only one hope. Surgery. Unless she had the tumor removed, her lungs would not be able to get better. The surgeons had told us before that as long as she was so sick that there would be no surgery. They also said that they were going to try to talk the surgeons into the surgery one more time. If the surgeons said no, we would start making my mom comfortable and taking her off the ventilator. Our hopes were not high. They told us to come in the next morning for an answer and then we would know what direction we were heading in. This morning was that morning.
    When I got to the hospital, I was preparing to say goodbye to my mother. We waited for the doctor. After a while the called me in. I was so nervous. Was I ready to do this? Is anyone? As we sat and listened to how serious things were and how she was so sick. But then I heard something else. "She is a fighter, I can't just give up on her." What was he saying? Then I realized. They were going to do the surgery!! I couldn't believe it. After we had given up all hope, there was the silver lining.
    So, they are doing the surgery.
        They are doing it sometime within a week.
            They are hopeful that with the surgery, her other problems will resolve themselves.

    I want to thank everyone who has been praying with us or just sending your good vibes. Things are looking hopeful and I am so glad that I just might get to have my mom around a little longer! They road is still very long and we will need all your good mojo in the weeks to come, but thank you! Lots of love to pass around tonight :)

    Thanks for reading.